Three Cats vs One Canary

I have a lot to do but I have to tell this one real quick.
Buck is on his way to India as we speak for nearly a month, business trip. He called me Saturday; the heat in his building went out and it was bitter cold with no landlord in sight. Could I mind the canary while he was gone? He was worried that if he didn't get it out fast it would get sick and die (they are really sensitive to drafts).
Enter Bandit, the little yellow guy with the black mask on his eyes like the Lone Ranger. Buck set the huge cage on the floor and Sorcha started sniffing- then Bandit moved and you should have seen the look on her face: eyes dilated, whiskers twitching, ear forward... We quickly cleared the dining room table and placed Bandit up (the leaves come out and it folds into a narrow table. We moved all the nearby furniture away. He is near sunlight, out of drafts and a heat register is right near him.
Sunday I spent the day chasing the cats from jumping on the edge of the table (there really is no room but they are determined). I am working on my poster presentation- due next week but draft due tomorrow, trying to set up organizational charts in Powerpoint so I can illustrate treatment arms and graph outcomes of studies.
I set up shop on the cushy chair where I study, near Bandit. I have candles around, had my puter playing Irish music while I type and Sorcha likes to snuggle behind my head. Well, every time a song sung by Katie McMahon of Anuna comes on (she has a really high soprano), Bandit would sing and flit around the cage like a maniac. I played several different sopranos and he goes berserk for Katie. He got so animated, Sorcha leaped from behind my head and landed on the 8 inches of table not covered by cage. Unfortunately for her, there was a lit candle there (next to the squirt bottle I kept squirting them with, apparently it isn't the deterrent I had hoped). She leaped off the table and tore up the stairs as I registered scorched fur smell. I tore after her, thinking she was on fire and ready to set the whole damn house up. She raced around, ending up on Buck's bunk- she stunk but was unhurt and not on fire, but she had big clumps of wax on her fur from the candle. I could hear her licking all night even tho I managed to cut most of them off.
After all the excitement, she left the bird be for the most part. But at 1 am I heard the unmistakable thump of a cat falling off the table again.
This morning he was waking up and cheerful and chirping.
This evening I got home and he seemed happy to see me- chirped back at me. Cats were lying around being nonchalant. When I came back in with the mail, I saw something bright glittering from the top of the cage. It was a collar- the kind that come off when a cat gets his head stuck somewhere. The big tag read "Cujo". I swear the bird was snickering.
I sat down in the cushy chair to work after supper and I noticed that on the back of Bandit's water dish (hung on the inside of the cage) is a huge chunk of cat fur- beige and fluffy (Cujo).
Bandit may be holding his own for now, but I think I am going to stop off and buy a hook and eye lock tomorrow. Bandit's moving to a safer location.
Bird 2 Kitties 0. Go Bird!